Wednesday, January 30, 2008

A Longing

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I've avoided this for awhile . . . but I've been a bit blue lately. Oh, I can feign amusement at work, or enjoy myself with friends, but it's time to admit what's bothering me. I have no one to touch me. (Not like that! Well -- like that but not!)

Seriously -- I miss a lovers touch. I can't remember the last time someone touched my bare shoulder, kissed my neck, twirled my hair, or just leaned up against me. Being alone is easy in so many ways -- make my own decisions, do what I want, get up whenever, buy whatever, do whatever . . . but I'd give it all up for someone to touch me. I long to feel alive, wanted, and loved. I know . . . just a bit lonely on a day when I should just get some sleep -- but it's keepin' me up. I'm hoping by dumping it all here it will get it off my mind. I do tend to bottle things up . . . ;)

"Hold my Hand"
~
Put your hand in mine.
Walk with me, follow me.
Be with me, don't let go.
Please, hold my hand.
~
I walked with you in the morning mist.
Your hair surrounded that angelic face.
You held my hand close to your heart.
We were one, walking down the beach.
The rising sun shimmering in the distance,
Our love radiating from with in our hearts.
And you held my hand . . .
~
I walked with you at noon.
With the sun high in the sky.
I never noticed those cold blue eyes.
I never noticed that cold heart.
You held my hand, with an icy grip.
The tenderness was gone,
But you held my hand . . .
~
I walk alone in the evening.
No one to bother me, no one to cause me pain.
I don't miss walking with you,
for you only wanted to walk by yourself.
I was not loved, not wanted.
The agony continues to build,
the sun setting in the west.
And no one held my hand . . .

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Leave your thoughts, comments, complaints, or random synaptic misfires . . . thx for reading and responding!! Love -- jj:)