A Taste of Success

Who doesn't love icecream?? I mean really - what's not to love?? Sugar, Milk, Flavor, Yummy goodness, Creamy . . . yeah, anyway - this is NOT about ice cream and how it made me sick the other day . . .

So, Wednesday I will register for courses, and then I'll officially become an undergrad student pursuing a Bachelor's (and eventually a Master's) in Psychology at Washburn University here in Topeka, KS. After much self reflecting and soul searching, I've heard a calling and have answered. I believe that I can help those that are struggling with the decision to have bariatric surgery, and more importantly help them deal with the issues that got them to this point.

At church this past Sunday (where I am now a member incidentally) I met a wonderful woman, we'll call her Xena (b/c I don't know if she'd want her name on here). It came to my attention that someone in the church was considering having a lap band. And since I had one, they wondered if I'd be willing to talk to her about my experiences and insights. Of course I said yes! Those of you that know me know that I am open book on this experience, as it has already completely changed my life!

So Xena and I chatted about the surgery itself, what I went through, where she's at in her journey to getting the band, commented on how precious her grand daughter is (she truly is), etc. We shared a lot, and I pray that the hope and joy I have come to experience from this procedure I was able to communicate to her. We laughed, shared phone #'s/emails, hugged, and parted ways.

That's when it hit me -- THIS IS WHAT YOU ARE GOING TO DO FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE! I'm going to help people that have had some tough experiences in life, and I will help them not only survive them, but be able to thrive. I get to help them slay their own demons, as I did mine. It's humbling, and motivating at the same time. It motivates me to continue to follow the program (btw - I'm up to 45 lbs lost in case you missed the counter change!!!) and to really focus on my upcoming degree endeavors. I don't want to become a psychologist quickly, I want to be a damn good one.

I've said before I'm not a big believer in fate. But I do believe in paths crossing for a reason, and I believe that we all affect each other and change each other a little as we pass through our lives. Xena did more for me than I did for her. I hope to repay the favor one day. God indeed works in mysterious, but wondrous ways. Good luck hon!!! I can't wait to find out your surgery date!!!


"Cocoon"

So long I've toiled, in my cocoon.
Building walls to stand against the elements,
to stand the threats of hunters,
to stand against the world.
Safely I'm bundled inside.

Slowly working, becoming more than I am.
Looking around, I must tear them all down.
The walls that protect now bind,
that heal not hurt.
Suffocatingly I'm bundled inside.

Tearing at the fibers, hopelessly fighting to get free.
A prisoner in my own shield,
Unable to cast it aside.
The only existence I've known.
Tragically I'm bundled inside.

Breaking through to the outside, my wings spread wide.
The armor prison falling down by my side,
The world around, not at all how I left it.
So full of hope, so full of life,
My soul no longer bundled inside.

Killing Time - Random Updates

If there's one thing I'm not good at, it's waiting. Guess it's a product of being a Gen-Xer -- instant gratification is such a necessity sometimes. Or maybe it's that I'm worried my ADD will kick in and I'll forget what I'm waiting for. Or maybe it's the excitement piece of wanting to move forward from where I'm at. Or it's that I have to leave for work soon and need to get this done. Or . . . (see - it's the ADD)

Seriously, I'm just chillin' waiting for 1pm so I can call the psychology department at Washburn to set up a meeting with an academic advisor to get my schedule set and then register for classes for this coming summer session and Fall 2009. It's kind of weird, but I'm going to be classified as a Freshmen again :) Of course, I'll be moving MUCH faster through those designations than my peers will be - since I only need a few classes to progress from each classification. In 2 years time ~ give or take a semester ~ I should be graduating with a Bachelor's in Psychology from Washburn University. Then comes one of the biggest decisions in my life - stay here to get my Master's or move back to Texas. I know where my heart is, but this decision has to be made with my mind. So - no rushing that . . .

Working out is going rather well. I've gone everyday since I joined the gym, and have enjoyed it a lot - suprisingly. I walk for 30 minutes or so at an incline and do some light dumbell work and resistance training to tone muscles. Last night, I started working on my "core" which is a nice way to say my big belly! That's a bit sore from last night :) Good news is that instead of dreading the gym, I actually look forward to it. I didn't sleep well the night before last so it was hard to really get into my workout yesterday, so I will really push myself tonight after work. Don't wanna fall off the wagon there . . .

Finally finished the redesign of my own website - http://www.joejoesdesigns.com/. I've been so busy with work, getting into school, and helping others with their websites and other design favors, that I just kept putting this off. I'm very happy with the outcome, a bit cleaner I think. Feel free to let me know what you think. Also keep in mind I would gladly help create a gift for you for someone - you just have to pay for the item (it's a hobby so don't charge - just like the challenge). Recently, I did a t-shirt for a good friend of mine that is going to Egypt for a year and he wanted a tee for his troops (he's in the Guard).

Have completely fallen in love with the Metropolitan Community Church of Topeka. It's such an open and welcoming congregation - they even gave me a coffee mug the first time I visited! I'm taking membership classes this Saturday to become a member of the church. I've ignored my spirituality for far too long, and am excited to reconnect. You know I am open with beliefs and don't want to push mine on anyone, just sharing here. For me, I seem to be on a journey that I can truly feel God's love - I really feel that I'm finally on the path he wants me to be.

So - other than major career change, going back to school, web design, working out, and joining a church I don't have much going on :) It's so strange to even see that list - I really am enjoying life again! Can't wait to get back home . . .

Anyway . . . killing time waiting for 1pm. Don't remember why but I'm waiting for 1 . . . ;)